Highlander University

Duncan MacLeod has grown his hair long once again, but he grumbles and complains about it so much that when he falls asleep after an extremely vigorous passage d'amour with Amanda, she pulls his hair into a ponytail with a an indestructible hair tie [available at the Highlander Store] and cuts the whole thing off in one piece. Amanda leaves the cabin of the barge, ponytail in hand, and tosses the ponytail overboard. It sinks to the bottom of the Seine [glub, glub], and Amanda returns to bed.

Floating along aimlessly, enjoying the effect of the water on its floating follicles, the Ponytail encounters the Hand of Xavier St. Cloud and the Pavilion of Kronos, who are locked in an eternal embrace. The three entities join forces and begin a Quest for the scattered Crystals of the Methuselah Stone.

A passing dolphin offers them transportaion to the site where the Crystals are at the bottom of the Seine, and they accept her offer gratefully; however, she turns on them and swallows them whole. The Hand and the Pavilion are doomed to live in the digestive system of the dolphin until she dies; however the dolphin coughs up the Ponytail [after swallowing a floating bottle of Acme hairball treatment] and it finds itself floating alone in the river again.

Who buys the popcorn and what movie do Duncan and Amanda see at the Notre Dame Cineplex that night?